Turning restrictions into great acts of compassion.
Back when I was living in non-acceptance, the very term ‘chronic illness’ would make me tense and recoil. And there was one reason in particular…
I couldn’t stand to be associated with the idea that I - and my life - was limited or restricted in any way.
I’ve worked really hard at reframing what the term ‘chronic illness’ means and feels like to me, but I still - on a regular basis - read or hear stuff that suggests life has to be less because of chronic illness, and I want to shout NOOOOOOOOO from the rooftops!
Take, for example, an email I received the other day;
“For so many of us living with autoimmune disease and chronic conditions, our worlds have shrunk down to fit what our bodies are now capable of.”
This sentence came from directly within the chronic illness community. Gulp!
I’ve made my feelings on this clear. I’d love for you to tune into yours. How does reading or hearing something like that make you feel? What emotions come to mind? How does it feel within your body?
The thing with that sentence, and all the others like it, is the language that’s used. It does not inspire; ‘shrunk down’ and ‘fit’ and ‘now capable’. Those words insinuate loss. They come from a place of being a victim to chronic illness.
They feed into the notion that we can’t, that we have to leave behind any of our past hopes and dreams, that we’re less than the person we used to be.
And I want more for you than to feed into that notion. I want you to dream and want and desire just as you always have. I want you to know that whatever you want in life, is possible for you.
None of that changes just because you live with chronic illness. The thing that does change is the how. Not worse, just different… and actually maybe better, because now you’re tuned into your needs and alignment in a way you perhaps weren’t before.
Making the how something that is so aligned feels amazing. You get to turn what others might call restrictions, what you maybe see as restrictions right now, into great acts of compassion.
Let's look at that sentence again…
“For so many of us living with autoimmune disease and chronic conditions, our worlds have shrunk down to fit what our bodies are now capable of.”
With a tweak here and there becomes…
“For so many of us living with autoimmune disease and chronic conditions, we’ve been given the opportunity to shape our worlds and create lives to perfectly fit our very unique selves.”
You tell me which one makes you feel more empowered, at peace with your chronic illness and your body, and ready to go and bloody well live your wonderful life?!
This isn’t about glossing over reality with a ‘positive mindset’. This is about putting your creative hat on, it’s about knowing there isn’t one single way to live life. It’s about knowing that everyone has needs, just (some of) yours are specific to living with chronic illness. It’s about owning that you’re at the helm of your life and you can live it in whichever way you so please!
There is nothing more compassionate than living your life in a way that is the perfect fit for you.
Practice.
I’d love for you to have a go at rewriting some of the restrictions that are currently alive within your world, whether through perception, adoption or because they’ve been impressed upon you. The above sentence is one example. Here are a couple more to get you going.
Example:
Restriction - I can’t work in a traditional 9-5 job because my chronic illness means I need to take too much time off and my employer won’t allow it.
Act of compassion - I’ve been handed the opportunity to work and earn money in a way that aligns with the needs of my body; I get to choose my hours, I get to work with the cycle of my chronic illness, I get to be my own boss, and as an added bonus, I’ve been able to explore different avenues of work which I wouldn’t have otherwise.
Restriction - Running really doesn’t feel good to do, so how am I meant to exercise? Chronic illness means I can’t do the exercise I need to do.
Act of compassion - I’ve been given an opportunity to explore forms of movement and exercise I didn’t even know existed! I get to find movement and exercise that makes my body feel good. This gets to be a fun process of experimentation, adding richness and colour to my tapestry.
Take your reframes as a starting point. Once you start to see restrictions as opportunities and great acts of compassion, you get to figure out how to bring them to life.